When I was 5 my mom and dad got a divorce.  Before my parents divorce I remember them fighting often. The fights were explosive.  The last fight I remember between my parents was over my dad wanting to listen to the radio and my mother wanting to watch the T.V. The fight became intense. During that fight my mom asked me to call the cops.  That night I saw my dad taken away in handcuffs.  That was my first life tragedy.  After their divorce my parents spoke very poorly of each other.  My mom would call my dad a liar and my dad would call my mom words I won’t repeat. 

In early elementary school I played a lot of sports.  I played soccer, baseball, basketball, football, and street hockey.   My favorite subject was P.E. and I loved recess.  I was a below average student.   I did see a school counselor because I was having emotional and behavioral issues due to my parents divorce. 

I started smoking weed and cigarettes at around age ten.  I got the weed from a neighbor girl and I stole the cigarettes from my daycare lady.  By the time I was in seventh grade I was smoking weed and cigarettes on a daily basis.  The only reason that I passed through middle school was because my mom told them to pass me.

Next was high school.  I probably spent most of my time sleeping, talking, or in the office.  I was always getting sent to the office for smoking or fighting. I got in a lot of fights.   My freshman year I met some new “friends”.  These friends introduced me to crystal meth.   The first time I tried meth was in the school bathroom.  My friend gave me the meth. He told me to go to the bathroom and snort it by myself.  If I had an allergic reaction he wouldn’t be blamed or get caught.  The first time I took meth was the only time I enjoyed it.  It gave me unlimited energy. I felt like I could take over the world. I felt like I was God. 

The more drugs I did the deeper I sank into darkness.  I did meth a lot at school.  My poor teachers had to put up with me and my bad attitude on a regular basis.  In the ninth grade I got expelled for breaking another student’s nose. Not only did I break his nose, I also broke my hand after hitting the classroom door.  The meth would make me rage.  My temper was out of control. I didn’t know when my rage would take over.  

My mom really wanted me to graduate high school.  Since I had gotten expelled I had to start a new school.  This school was a private Christian school in Arlington.  I only had to go there for one hour per week and turn in my homework. It sounded like a great idea to me.  So I played along. This schedule allowed me to hangout and get high without school getting in the way.  A kids dream!

Between ages 16 and 17 my addictions became unmanageable. At that time I moved out of my parent’s house. I left home to do drugs and live the party life.   Soon after I moved out I became homeless and lost.  I lived from place to place and went from couch to couch.  I stayed at many crack houses.  One house that I stayed in got condemned due to garbage and chemicals from drug use. When the PUD shut off the power we ended up stealing electricity from the neighbors.   This house got raided twice while I was there.  When I didn’t have anywhere to stay I would just walk the streets all night always chasing my next drug.  I was involved in many illegal activities.  I would rob people, people would rob me.  Several people that I knew ended up getting murdered due to drug use.  On average the drug would keep me up for a week and a half. After about three days of being awake I would see imaginary people.  I would have the symptoms of a paranoid schizophrenia. I would also randomly fall asleep.  One time I remember being awake for almost a month.

After a week long meth binge I showed up at my mom’s house.  My parents told me I had to leave and that I couldn’t come back until I wanted to get clean.  I eventually did get clean.  Well… I ended up getting clean after a DUI, two MIPS, and a possession charge. When I got my DUI I tried to get in a fight with the cops and they won.  I then tried running into oncoming traffic on the freeway. I remember running toward the cars trying to kill myself.   Thankfully the cops stopped me.   And that was the beginning of my recovery.

I put myself into inpatient rehab.  In rehab I had more mental withdrawals then physical withdrawals.  It was hard, but I wanted to change.  After 21 days of inpatient I went to outpatient.  At outpatient I got hooked up with a program called Narcotics Anonymous.  I would say that I became very spiritual, but slowly over time I knew that something bigger than me was working in my life.  I didn’t really have much of an idea of what it was, but I knew it was there.  Shortly after that God put Justin Barbeau in my life.  He invited me to church and I went with him.  After a couple weeks of going to church, Justin led me to the Lord!!  At the time I didn’t fully grasp what it meant, but now I realize that I will never totally understand God.  The more I went to church and learned about God, the more I felt uplifted.  Shorty after that I met Ganelle Hansen and her family.  We started going to a life group at Pastor Mike’s house where I learned a lot.  I started to really find myself as a Christian and a follower of Jesus.  We also started attending the Alpha Group which was awesome.  Jesus and I have a wonderful relationship and He gives me what I need in life.  Regularly I give myself to Jesus and He restores me to sanity.  I have received great family and great friends in Christ. I have been at the same job for a year and five months.   I have been clean of drugs and alcohol for over two years. I even managed to quit smoking cigarettes.  My life is so great today living for Christ!!